We have finally reached Friday, friends. For some reason every day this week felt like it should have been Friday. Maybe it is because September is finally upon us and summer is slowing abandoning us for her sabbatical, maybe because I’ve been without my best friend for five weeks, or maybe it is because Kanye West announced he wants to be POTUS and I just can’t stop thinking about moving to New Zealand or London or Africa or anywhere that would be better than a nation run by President and First Lady Kimye…for any of these reasons, or maybe others, it has been slow and hard and one of those weeks where I’ve just felt small.
Judging by the amount of clothes on my floor, it has also been busy. And when being busy and feeling small come together for me, the devil has an easy way in to start whispering lies to my heart. When I don’t allow the sacred space for the Lord to combat those lies, I start to think maybe, maybe it might be true. Maybe I am small, maybe my voice doesn’t matter, maybe I’m not worth loving. My life and emotions have been a foul cocktail of some loss, some insecurity, some jealousy, some fear, and some disappointment.
The Lord is so gracious in these moments. We so often preach a Gospel of self-hatred; we are so consumed with our sin that we are no good to ourselves or anyone around us, or we think that we need to rid ourselves of everything that makes us, us. Yes, our sin is ugly and we need to be aware of it. But Jesus came so that we don’t need to obsess over that or be defined by that anymore. We are so free, so beautiful, so full of grace because of Him. Also, He loves everything about you. You are created uniquely in His Image, so don’t think for one second that you need to abandon who you are.
Friends, He is SO FOR US. He has given me such sweet, gentle blessings this week reminding me who I am and what I am worth. When the devil starts bringing back up all those false beliefs I used to have about myself – that I am insignificant, small, forgettable – God is so faithful in reminding me who I really am.
Our small group decided to study Psalm 139 this week, and we were so grateful for the way it points us back to our identity:
You know when I sit down and when I rise up; you discern my thoughts from afar. You search out my path and my lying down and are acquainted with all my ways.
You hem me in, behind and before, and lay your hand upon me.
My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth.
I am fearfully and wonderfully made.
Jesus is such a fan of you. He thinks you are a Treasure, He says you are all beauty, all grace, all charm. Awe and wonder wrapped up in a one-of-a-kind gem of a person. May you know in your heart of hearts, friend, how marvelous He believes you are.