Come Into the Light (or: For When You are Feeling Crazy)

Over and over again, I am amazed at my capacity to be a crazy person. Do you ever feel that way? The most recent run-in with my psycho side happened this past weekend. My two best friends texted and asked to get brunch. I was meeting with my mentor, so I said no and encouraged them to do it without me. Their response was, “what about tonight? Sunday?” Why are they trying so hard to see me? Their persistence had only one probable cause in my crazy mind: they must be planning an intervention. Clearly I had been a bad friend recently and they really needed to confront me about it. That is the only logical reason they would go to such lengths to spend time with me.

I’m serious. I am actually crazy! This is how you know your mind is not in a good space – when instead of believing that an invitation is because people like you, you think it must be because they need to confront you about all your flaws.

It helped me realize that I was feeling as though everyone else around me must be disappointed with or mad at me too; it wasn’t just these two friends I was worried about. I get into these busy seasons where I try to fit everything in, with the goal of pleasing everyone and meeting everyone’s needs – and instead I end up feeling like I most certainly am disappointing everyone.

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Life Mantras and Ankle Tattoos

It is a cliche Christian college girls question: “Which bible guy would you want to marry?” Ew gross I can’t believe I really participated in that conversation. But alas, it happened. My answer was Joshua. My thought process was pretty simple: Joshua wasn’t a screw-up. (This probably has something to do with my expectations of […]

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A Rhythm of Life

I recently reminisced with some friends about the weeklong retreat class we attended about two years ago for our graduate program. That week changed my life in some really significant ways. I had recently lost my nannying job, which now I thank Jesus for on the daily, but at the time I was pretty wrecked. […]

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Rebuilt and Renamed

This past week I had to give a presentation on my “formational journey” in one of my classes.  It is as terrifyingly personal as it sounds, and even though there are only twelve of us in the class, each who I know well and am comfortable with, I was still incredibly nervous. It ended up […]

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